Directionally challenged

For the longest time, the only way I could differentiate 'left' from 'right' was by associating the fact that I ate with my 'right' hand. So, every time I had to do something which involved sides or direction, I'd first pretend I was eating. So my right hand would go to my mouth, then I'd figure ah! This is the right side, and proceed to do whatever it was I was doing with this new knowledge.

And I'd never seem to actually register a permanent record. It was like learning anew every time. And it sometimes got embarassing too. A person that old shouldn't need 30 seconds to realise which side was which. Soon, people at home learnt not to give me, the directionally challenged inmate, tasks which required this skill. Such as 'Put the too-hot-to-touch cup on the left, so I don't touch it by accident' or 'Get my handbag from the car - it's the one on the right'.

I sometimes feel sorry for the people sitting with me on the bike or in the car. Well, at least they can say their lives have flashed before their eyes several times, not just once or twice like other, unluckier people.