Mars and Venus

Men and Women are very, very different. Get used to it, it ain't gonna change anytime soon.

I recently read an entry on another blog about changing perceptions, the sexual revolution, and how they've affected women. It got me thinking. I did agree with a lot that lady said, and I really liked her perspective. I have a lot of respect for women who realise that men and women should not be compared on certain levels and that the whole "equality" thing is just a pile of crap.

I hope I can put all my ideas in a clear, logical manner (it all seemed so damn clear last night, in the 10 minutes before I fell asleep). Let's start with the women's lib movement. Its basic claim is that women are as good or better than men in any/all field(s). Am I the only one who feels this is an absolutely ridiculous notion? If it were the case, why have 2 sexes in the first place? Why wouldn't evolution have made us all equal, and capable of reproducing asexually? Because males and females are basically designed for different functions.

Neither sex is 'smarter' in an absolute sense. Men and women are equally intelligent and adept - just at different things. For example, women are basically not as good drivers as men(please don't bother arguing, it's a scientific fact). This is because women are not as good at judging spatial distances as men. Males developed this skill as a survival mechanism during the hunting-gathering stage. Males are better equipped genetically for things like driving. Yes, there are very good women drivers. But they are a sufficiently small percentage of driving women, and an even smaller percentage of women as a whole, to not be taken into account here.

Men are not as good cooks, home makers, or instinctual parents as women. Maternal instinct is such a bloody powerful thing. Mothers today still have it genetically, because the ancestral females had no other way of communication with the young offspring. That instinct is something men can never hope to develop. Do you see men looking at a baby and going 'Awwww..I want one of thooooseee!" No. But a woman might, because the instinct is already there and aroused at the presence of a young, helpless child. Cooking and home making come in the package deal. Now, some of the best chefs in the world are men, but by the same argument as earlier, they can be discounted.

There are many, many other things where this theory applies but I won't go into them - they just go into loop arguments. Let's just say that at an individual level, men and women are equal and deserve the same things. Happiness or satisfaction with one's life, for example.

For the survival and continuation of our species, we need families. Two parents works just fine for us - we have thousands of years of history as evidence. Social evolution has brought the concept of marriage. Fine. Now, purely on a happiness scale, how do you think the East and the 'developed' West compare in marital happiness (in urban populations)? Not too well. It's very well known that divorce, broken homes, traumatised childhoods leading to deviant/disfunctional adulthoods are far more common in the West. Why? Because the East has more or less stuck to the basics.

Sex.

As the great man said, it's finally basically fundamentally ultimately in the end all about sex. And however much we try to hide from it, it's very, very logical. Males need sex. Males want sex. Sex is designed to be pleasurable for males (alright, MORE pleasurable). Males are designed to procreate. DESIGNED. In the evolutionary years, if you were a male and you were still alive, you musta done SOMEthing goddamn right. You were probably better suited for survival because your genes were better than the next chump's. So kindly fuck around as much as possible to give your progeny the best chance of surviving, and propagating a stronger, hopefully genetically superior generation. Males have polygamy ingrained in their genes. It's like driving.

To the women, sex is not the greatest thing since sliced bread. A little thought, and it becomes a little clearer that the basic act of intercourse is not designed to be pleasurable to females, Remember, I said BASIC. That's right. Missionary. Wham bam, look Ma, I'm done types. Basic. The genetic drive of the female is stability. For her progeny. For herself. The father has good genes ('cos he was ALIVE) and she was picked because though the male is designed to want to hump anything that moves, given a choice, the male's mating instinct leads him to the best bearer of his progeny. Factor also that males produce sperm all their lives while females lose reproductive capacity at a certain age, you might begin to see why males always look for younger, better, models. But the female always wants stability. It's genetic. Like the maternal instinct.

Now, factor society, marriage and it's concepts of monogamy, emotion and love...and it gets a whole world more complicated. Not to say that's bad. Hey, we've survived thus far, head of the food chain, brought the planet to its knees...we have a lot to be proud of.

Picture this. Within our social settings, the man still wants sex most of the time. There's a primary need that needs satisfying. The woman is not too keen, but gives it to him. Whenever, wherever, whatever. The man's thrilled. That's all he wants, really. So he doesn't feel the need to 'stray'. Has his progeny, supports them (after all, they ARE the way to ensure the perpetuation of his genes), keeps the family happy. The woman has the children, and satisfies the burning maternal instinct. She's safe, children safe and decent future assured - stability. That's all she wants, really.

Man: not too keen on stability, but will stay if sex is good.
Woman: not too keen on sex, but will give if stability is assured.

Since men and women are EQUAL in all areas except those based on instinct and physical capabilities, a compromise is made on the fundamental issues. With our modern outlook, both men and women are free to do whatever else they want. As long as nothing affects the family unit. Family safe. Both parties more or less happy and satisfied (isn't that what we all want, ultimately?). Good/best chances of progeny survival and procreation.

Think it'll work??

Marry me!