Payback
The girl who shook my faith in evolution a few posts ago (see Conversations with Dog series)is now getting her own back - she haunts my dreams.
She (obviously) doesn't know of the existence of this blog. If she does, she's doing a pretty good job of hiding it because I can still feel my limbs. Actually, I can still feel, period. Anyway, based on previous evidence I'd have to put that kind of sneakiness beyond her. For the past two nights, she manages to open a chat window in my subconscious and, as if what I go through in the day is not enough, I'm subjected to a little more at night. The scary part is when she asks "who's this Non-Sensei person? I've heard of this blog...think I'll check it out..". And I scream ineffectually to get her to stop. But momentum is a powerful thing. It is, after all, MASS multiplied by velocity. I'm only ONE MAN! Mercy!! And I wake up.
I do realise it was probably a little...not nice maybe, to put up that conversation. But I could NOT help it. I had to make a choice between 'nice' and gut ripping laughter value. C'mon, this was a no-brainer question. It's like asking a guy if he'd like to be called 'cute' or which shade of pink looks better - this one or this one?
She pulled another one yesterday but the last remnants of decency I seem to possess and my concern for your stomachs prevents me from putting it up here. This one, I could let pass, but the other ones just BEGGED to be recorded for posterity. For those who may didn't find them all that funny, you had to be there. Or you would have had to have crossed similar people in life. I asked her a question yesterday and felt like Chandler waiting for the wheels to turn slowly in Joey's head, waiting to hear that satisfying click which means - ah, I think I understand now...I think...
So she haunts my dreams now. My guilty conscience won't let me sleep at night. I could be a tragic hero, sacrificing all that is dear to me for your entertainment. But those lines she said deserved this. Didn't they? Aw, c'mon...stop looking at me like that! Y'all enjoyed it while yous were reading it, now you're wagging reproaching fingers at me?! Humph!
Fair weather friends...
She (obviously) doesn't know of the existence of this blog. If she does, she's doing a pretty good job of hiding it because I can still feel my limbs. Actually, I can still feel, period. Anyway, based on previous evidence I'd have to put that kind of sneakiness beyond her. For the past two nights, she manages to open a chat window in my subconscious and, as if what I go through in the day is not enough, I'm subjected to a little more at night. The scary part is when she asks "who's this Non-Sensei person? I've heard of this blog...think I'll check it out..". And I scream ineffectually to get her to stop. But momentum is a powerful thing. It is, after all, MASS multiplied by velocity. I'm only ONE MAN! Mercy!! And I wake up.
I do realise it was probably a little...not nice maybe, to put up that conversation. But I could NOT help it. I had to make a choice between 'nice' and gut ripping laughter value. C'mon, this was a no-brainer question. It's like asking a guy if he'd like to be called 'cute' or which shade of pink looks better - this one or this one?
She pulled another one yesterday but the last remnants of decency I seem to possess and my concern for your stomachs prevents me from putting it up here. This one, I could let pass, but the other ones just BEGGED to be recorded for posterity. For those who may didn't find them all that funny, you had to be there. Or you would have had to have crossed similar people in life. I asked her a question yesterday and felt like Chandler waiting for the wheels to turn slowly in Joey's head, waiting to hear that satisfying click which means - ah, I think I understand now...I think...
So she haunts my dreams now. My guilty conscience won't let me sleep at night. I could be a tragic hero, sacrificing all that is dear to me for your entertainment. But those lines she said deserved this. Didn't they? Aw, c'mon...stop looking at me like that! Y'all enjoyed it while yous were reading it, now you're wagging reproaching fingers at me?! Humph!
Fair weather friends...
spouted by Non-Sensei at 5/24/2004 09:01:00 PM
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